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Workout Routines Ideal for Moms

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Are you a full-time mom raising a toddler or growing kid? Do you sometimes feel overworked? Do you also feel the need to exercise at least a few times each week?

Well, you’re not alone. Indeed parenting is such a tough job more so if you’re just starting a family. Any hands-on mom or dad can attest to this.

mom with carrier

Parenting requires not just a sound mind but most especially a fit body. It is only when you’re physically and emotionally healthy that you are able to take on the great responsibilities of raising a child into a useful and independent individual.

If you feel that you lack some exercise, take heart because unaware to you, there are already various daily chores that you do that help work out your body. Know what they are and what you can do more to allow you to do a little exercise.
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Originally posted on January 31, 2013 @ 2:30 am

Baby Shower Tips

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Are you thinking of having a baby shower but cannot decide on what would be fun and interesting to do? Like with any party, there are so many things that you can choose from, and that may leave you confused. Here are some of the ways that you can do to make your baby shower organized, interesting and fun: [Read more…] about Baby Shower Tips

Originally posted on September 22, 2012 @ 9:39 am

Are You Spending More Time With The Kids?

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The Easter holidays have traditionally been the time for families to get together. I think it is practically the same all over the world – at least in those parts where Easter is celebrated. Anyhow, we went to a relatively nearby beach resort for an extended weekend, and one thing that struck me was that there were quite a lot of families there. I suppose I shouldn’t have been that surprised as this resort is well known for being family-friendly. The many other times that I have visited this place, though, I didn’t see as many families with kids. Another thing that was good to see was how much time the parents and kids spent with each other. We would be sitting there enjoying the sun and sand, and we would see other parents and their children doing the same. Even those with teenagers were having a great time with each other! (Now those with teens would know that this phase is not the easiest when it comes to parenting!)

I couldn’t help but feel happy that in this day and age of family dysfunction, I was surrounded by people who valued time spent with the family; children and parents who genuinely seemed to enjoy being around each other.

Lest you think that this is a mere impression on my part, let me share with you an article published recently in a New York Times blog. Written by Tara Parker-Pope, it talks about how family time has grown – surprisingly. She writes that while modern parents continually moan over how they do not have enough time for the kids due to all the responsibility heaped on their shoulders, a recent study shows that the parents of today actually spend more time with the family as compared to parents of previous generations.

She quoted numbers to back up her statement:

The study, by two economists at the University of California, San Diego, analyzes a dozen surveys of how Americans say they use their time, taken at different periods from 1965 to 2007. It reports that the amount of child care time spent by parents at all income levels — and especially those with a college education — has risen “dramatically” since the mid-1990s. (The findings by the husband-and-wife economist team of Garey Ramey and Valerie A. Ramey appear in a discussion paper presented in March at a Brookings Institution conference in Washington.)

Before 1995, mothers spent an average of about 12 hours a week attending to the needs of their children. By 2007, that number had risen to 21.2 hours a week for college-educated women and 15.9 hours for those with less education.

The figures for 2007 are impressive, aren’t they? If you think about a week as being 40 hours (for those who work, that’s the normal time spent at the office), half of that is spent on childcare! That number can easily rise for stay at home moms (or dads, for that matter).

Now, the question is this: how much time do you spend on your children? I suppose we shouldn’t really be fixated on the numbers alone, but it’s a great start. The year isn’t halfway gone, maybe it’s time that you re-consider the amount of time that you allot for the family.

Originally posted on April 8, 2010 @ 3:13 am

Kids Need to Feel Important

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i-am-important

Ever noticed how kids will keep pestering you just when you are intent on doing something. The more engrossed you are, the more they will bug you. You just want an hour to enjoy your game and they want to play it for you. It can be annoying!

Truth is they just want to be part of what you’re doing. If you are having fun, they want to have fun with you. If you enjoy cooking, they will try and enjoy it too. They love helping you decorate for christmas. They’ll even try to help wrap presents.

Of course there are times that you have to say no but before you tell them they can’t why not check if there is someway they can take part. For example, you’re busy in the kitchen getting dinner ready and you don’t really want them around your knives. How about just having them peel the veggies or wash the potatoes.

If you’re painting, why not give your kid a paintbrush too and assign him his own corner to color? He may not do as big a space as you and his corner may not be as even but that is easily taken care of.

Do you love word games, the crosswords maybe? Get a book of word puzzles that the two of you can do together. Invite him to bring his puzzles to where you sit and you can sit companionably together as you each solve your games.

These may seem like small things for them to do but the effect on them is huge. Kids love to “help out”. Let them and watch as they amaze you with what they can do.

Photo via Dynamoash

Originally posted on August 27, 2010 @ 1:15 pm

Are You A Faithful Parent?

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Faith – together with all its derivatives – is not an easy word. For some people, faith is all about spirituality and religion. For others, it can have a more secular meaning. Whether you lean towards the former or the latter, you might want to dwell on the idea of faithful parenting a bit. I guess I am in a reflective mood at the moment, and I am mulling over whether or not I am being a faithful parent.

So what does being a faithful parent mean exactly? The whole idea came to me when I was reading an article at the Merced Sun Star. Admittedly, the article’s slant is quite spiritual (or religious; call it what you will). It does pose some interesting questions, though. The Rev. Jennifer Goto writes:

All of us are trying to be faithful parents.

We strive to have faith in our own instincts and our abilities to care for the most precious people in our lives.

We hold on to the faith that our children will have their own abilities to overcome the mistakes we make and the obstacles they will face in life.

We attempt to be faithful to what we know is right, to the truths we hold dear and want to pass on to our children.

How true is that? Indeed, being a parent is the best job in the world, yet at the same time, it can be quite scary. For so many years, you are responsible for the life of another person. Not only do you have to provide for them, to meet their physical needs, but you also have to ensure that they grow up to be responsible and independent adults.

I know that you wish only the best for your children – just like any other parent. You want your children to imbibe values that will last them a lifetime. Yet we can only do so much as parents. We can teach our children everything we know – and maybe go even further by learning new things ourselves – and yet at the end of the day, there are certain things out of our control.

Our children will grow up and learn things for themselves, do things on their own. We can only have faith that we do a good job and that our children will remember the lessons that we seek to impart to them. That’s faithful parenting. Trusting that we raise our children right and that they will hold on to what they’ve learned. After that, everything is up in the air.

Are you being a faithful parent? I would like to think that I am.

Originally posted on February 22, 2010 @ 1:35 am

Book In Focus: Parenting Well In A Media Age

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We cannot deny it: we are living in a media age. Think back to when you were growing up. It might be that you didn’t have television, or perhaps if you did, your viewing time was limited. The chances are that you didn’t have Internet access. After all, the Internet didn’t really become widely used till the last decade or so.

Today, however, our children are bombarded with information from all sorts of media: TV, radio, and the Internet. There is no way that we can shelter them from these, is there?

One question enters my mind: is it really necessary to shelter children from the information available to them? After all, we cannot overlook the fact that there is a lot of useful information to be had. I suppose the trick lies in us knowing how to handle the amount and quality of information that our children access.

This is where this book, Parenting Well In A Media Age, comes into the picture. I haven’t had the chance to read the whole book, but I came across it on Amazon; and the title was enough to catch my attention. The product description reads:

This illuminating investigation takes a fresh look at the role of media in children’s lives. An overview of the formidable challenges parents face and creative ways to overcome them are included, as are strategies for turning a home environment from “high-tech” to “high-touch.” Moving beyond demonizing the media, this work, like none before it, articulates the difficulties of parenting in our depersonalized society. It offers hopeful alternatives for all parents wanting to protect children from, and teach children about, media’s impact.

I like the way the contents were described – it does not pinpoint media as “bad” in general. Instead, it highlights the fact that our society can become depersonalized even more because of the way information is presented. I am sure that no one will disagree when I say that parenting is a highly personalized job!

Then again, due to our busy schedules, it is quite easy to fall into the trap of providing our children with entertainment alternatives more than we ought to.

Go watch this education DVD while I make dinner. Go play with your PS3 or Xbox360 while I finish some paperwork. Go on the Internet to find the answer to your question.

These are some common “commands” some parents give their children too often. Perhaps in this book, we might find ways to handle various situations better. I am quite interested in getting my hands on a copy.

Has anyone read the book? Or maybe, you have your own pointers on how to become a good parent in this media age.

Originally posted on April 25, 2010 @ 2:14 pm

My 4-year-old Rebel

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Little Boy

My four-and-a-half-year-old has become a rebel. I’m not sure when it happened or why. Maybe it was during the summer when he and his sister were fighting all day (and night). Maybe it’s because he found out we were expecting baby # 4 (!!). Well, whenever it happened, what’s happened is that my little angelic O is now a mini James Dean.

Take this morning. It’s time to get ready for school and the little rebel is up and ready to rebel. After 10 minutes and tears he’s finally dressed, but getting out of the house takes another 15 minutes (after he lies down on the kitchen floor in defiance). It’s the same for most of the day, where I have to repeat myself about 100x. Bathtime? He runs away. Dinner? He won’t come to the table. Bedtime? Please put away that toy, I’m turning off the lights. His talking toy camera keeps talking and I am ignored yet again.

So you can imagine I have been at my wits end all week, and to keep myself sane, I tried to look for some positives. One good thing is that my (usually) extremely naughty 7-year-old is now starting to look like an angel (she may be putting this on given her little brother’s new rebel status). Another good thing is that having done my online research, my little rebel is actually going through what you could call another natural process of growing up. And that other than the “busy” points of the day (like dressing, mealtimes, bed), he is still a very sweet boy. This, from Baby Center, made a lot of sense:

“Defiance is how your preschooler asserts himself….remember, too, that disciplining your preschooler doesn’t mean controlling him — it means teaching him to control himself. Punishment might get him to behave, but only because he’s afraid not to. It’s best for your child to do the right thing because he wants to — because it makes the day more fun for him or makes him feel good…”

So take heart parents of little rebels, and realize that this too shall pass (and hopefully your preschooler will start behaving again). For more good advice from real Moms, check out these Expert Answers.

Photo via afsilva

Originally posted on August 17, 2009 @ 2:26 am

Same Sex Couples And Parenting

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image580732xThis is probably going to be a controversial post. We all have our beliefs as to sexual orientation and it was not long ago when that hullaballoo about same sex marriage in California hit the headlines. With all the focus on same sex marriage, have you ever thought about same sex parents/parenting?

The reason for this post is the article “Same-sex couples can be effective parents, researchers find,” which I read over at USA Today. The bottom line is this:

Children raised by same-sex couples appear to do as well as those raised by parents of both sexes, suggests an international research review that challenges the long-ingrained belief that children need male and female parents for healthy adjustment.

“It’s more about the quality of the parenting than the gender of the parents,” says Judith Stacey of New York University, co-author of the comprehensive review. It will be published Friday in the Journal of Marriage and Family.

Naturally, I had to look into the details. What did they measure effective parenting by? Apparently, they took a look at things such as self-esteem, social adjustment, performance in school, and so on. I cannot argue that these things are universally regarded as important by parents, can you?

Experts say that what counts is the quality of the parents rather than the gender. It reminded me of the forever present argument when it comes to the corporate world. It used to be that men got better jobs and higher pay in spite of the fact that there are women who are just as qualified as they are. (Maybe this is still happening, I am not so sure.) The perennial argument is that the gender does not matter.

Maybe I am a bit traditional in this sense as I cannot help but think about the need of children for a father figure. This could be because I grew up with the males in my family on a pedestal. This could also be because I want my children to grow up with the father figuring prominently in their lives.

Still, we cannot discount the fact that there are children being raised today without a (traditional) father and a (traditional) mother, and studies show that they are doing just fine. I suppose that it doesn’t work for (or sit well with) everyone, and it really is the quality that will matter at the end of the day.

What’s going through your mind?

Originally posted on January 22, 2010 @ 3:35 am

Be An Effective Parent: Don’t Yell In The Morning!

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Animal School
Animal School
Today I watched the Animal School video of Ellen Braun yet again. It never fails to make me somewhat teary, but more importantly, inspires me to be a better, or as Ellen rightly says, effective parent.

I’ve blogged about this in the past, but I just can’t give enough praise to this video, or to Ellen’s website, Raising Small Souls. I’m fortunate to say that my parenting experiences have been wonderful, but as every Mom will know, there are just days (ok, weeks or even longer!), when things do get on top of you, when you find yourself shouting in the morning rush for the school bus, at homework time (“for the last time, come and do your homework NOW!!”), at bedtime (“stay in bed, please!”) and throughout the day (“don’t hit your sister!”).

My husband, who has infinite patience with the kids and has only ever blown up with them just two or three times in the 6 1/2 years we’ve been parents, keeps me in check by saying very calmly,

“you’re very angry these days”

And that’s always a good wake-up call! But aside from spousal intervention, there are a number of things you can do to stop the Mom fury ( I’ll be listing my favourites down in a future post). Ellen has an interesting article in her site which tells you to “yell at your kids in the afternoons, not in the mornings“, which is a great idea, because you can still yell, just not all day, which is do-able, right?

Now I’m all for a “joyful morning atmosphere”, but
some of her other “Rise and Shine” ideas, like making blueberry pancakes WITH the kids, is downright impossible in my household on school days. Like my husband, my daughter is a zombie for at least the first hour upon waking, so the idea of baking at 6.00 a.m. would probably solicit more yelling from me anyway. But she does make a good point in saying that:

“Let us begin with the premise that the morning sets the tone remainder of the day. We all know that ‘waking up on the wrong side of the bed’ can forecast the beginning of a troublesome day, so the opposite must hold true as well: a pleasant morning will foretell the wonderful afternoon that is ahead!”

Originally posted on October 4, 2008 @ 4:42 pm